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Jokes - A new funny joke each day to keep you laughing.

Jokes - June 2007

Bar Jokes

June 1st 2007 12:25
A woman is in the bar of a cruise ship and she asks the bartender for a scotch and two drops of water. As the bartender gives her the drink, she says, "It's my birthday today, and I'm on the cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday."
The bartender says, "Well, since it's your birthday I'll buy you a drink; in fact, I'll take care of this one for you." As the women finishes her drink the woman to her right says, "I guess I should buy you a drink."
The old woman says, "All right. Bartender, I want a scotch and two drops of water."
"All right," says the bartender. As she finishes her drink, the man to her right says, "Since I'm the only one around you that hasn't bought you a drink, I guess I might as well buy you one."
The old woman says, "All right. Bartender I want a scotch and two drops of water."
"Coming right up," the bartender says. As he gives her the drink he says, "Ma'am, I'm dying of curiosity. Why the scotch and only two drops of water?"
The old woman replies, "Sonny, you learn that when you're my age, you can hold your liquor but you sure can't hold your water."

Short and long bar jokes


Sitting at the bar, a very sad Rob told the bartender that he was drinking to forget the heartbreak of his broken engagement.
"Yeah," said Rob, "would you marry someone who didn't know the meaning of the word faithful, and who flaunted their infidelity in your face"

" No way in hell" said the bartender.

"Well, said Rob, "neither would my fiancé".




*This image is licensed under the CeCILL. It came from the Wikipedia page for Bar (establishment).

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