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Jokes - A new funny joke each day to keep you laughing.

Jokes to Make You Groan

August 18th 2010 03:18
Groan Number 1
A frog walks into a bank and goes up to the teller, Patty Black. He says, "I'd like a loan." Patty Black replies, "Do you have any collateral?" The frog says, "Yes, Patty Black, I have a pink ceramic elephant." Patty Black says, "Well, I'll have to check with my boss, I'll be right back." Patty Black leaves the room and goes into her bosses office. She says, "Sir, there is a frog out there who wants a loan and he has a pink ceramic elephant for collateral. I shouldn't give it to him, should I?" Her boss says, "It's a knick-knack, Patty Black, give the frog a loan."


jokes to make you groan


Groan Number 2
There was this African chief at the turn of the last century whose obsession was to conquer other chiefs and take their thrones as trophies. These thrones he would collect and display in the second level of his magnificent palace just above his own luxurious throne. This palace was renowned for its construction that was in keeping with the best of tradition -- everything was made of grass and leaves.
One day, the chief was on his throne receiving some ambassadors when the trophy thrones above him proved to be too heavy and the straw platform collapsed. The thrones fell on him, and sad to say, he joined his ancestors in the happy hunting grounds.
Which just goes to show that people who live in grass houses shouldn't stow thrones.


Groan Number 3

Two couples, one English and one Czech, went river fishing in the Northern Territory of Australia. The men decided to go first, leaving behind their wives to set up tent, so that they can catch fish for lunch. Shortly after they left, the wives heard blood-curdling screams, and they rushed to the river bank to see their husbands gone, but two bloated crocodiles lounging nearby. They feared the worst, and rushed back to their campsite to call the park rangers on their mobile.
When the two rangers arrived, armed with crocodile guns, all four hurried to the river bank. This is the reported conversation.
Ranger 1: Jeeesuz! Looks like the crocs got a f**king meal! There's a male croc and a female croc!
Ranger 2: Too bloody right! Look, shoot them both, then cut open the female first.
Ranger 1: OK! [Shoots both crocs, then cuts open the female]
English woman [sceaming]: Oh God, the female crocodile has eaten my husband!
Ranger 1 to Ranger 2: Shall I cut open the other croc?
Ranger 2: Well, there's no hurry now, for it's clear as hell that the Czech's in the male.
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