Ian
Shilpa KarhikTax Jokes
June 6th 2007 10:05
There was a time when $200.00 was the down-payment on a car; now it's the sales tax.
If my business gets much worse, I won't have to lie on my next tax return.
Children may be deductible, but they are still taxing.
The rich and the poor are alike. They both complain about taxes.
The wealth of experience is one possession that hasn't been taxed . . . .yet.
A fool and his money are soon parted. The rest of us wait until income tax time.
Everybody works for the government, either on the payroll or the taxroll.
A man's home is his castle. At least that's how he feels when he pays taxes on it.
When making out your tax return, it's better to give than to deceive.
I hate junk mail . . .and that includes the tax forms they send me.
When it comes to income tax, most of us would be willing to pay as we go if we could only catch up on where we've been.
An auditor from the tax office rang a synagogue and asked to speak to the rabbi.
"Rabbi, is Mr Morris Katz a member of your congregation?"
"Yes, indeed he is."
"Can you confirm that he made the $100,000 donation to the synagogue that he claimed in his tax return?"
"I can assure you that he will!"
The Federal Police sent three photographs of a man wanted for tax evasion to their Irish counterparts, saying that they had reason to believe that he had escaped to Ireland. The photos were front face and two side shots.
Three weeks later the Irish Police sent back a message: "We got the fellow in the middle, but we are still looking for the other two."
When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ball-point pens would not work in zero gravity.
To combat this problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion developing a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to over 300° C.
The Russians use a pencil.
If my business gets much worse, I won't have to lie on my next tax return.
Children may be deductible, but they are still taxing.
The rich and the poor are alike. They both complain about taxes.
The wealth of experience is one possession that hasn't been taxed . . . .yet.
A fool and his money are soon parted. The rest of us wait until income tax time.
Everybody works for the government, either on the payroll or the taxroll.
A man's home is his castle. At least that's how he feels when he pays taxes on it.
When making out your tax return, it's better to give than to deceive.
I hate junk mail . . .and that includes the tax forms they send me.
When it comes to income tax, most of us would be willing to pay as we go if we could only catch up on where we've been.
An auditor from the tax office rang a synagogue and asked to speak to the rabbi.
"Rabbi, is Mr Morris Katz a member of your congregation?"
"Yes, indeed he is."
"Can you confirm that he made the $100,000 donation to the synagogue that he claimed in his tax return?"
"I can assure you that he will!"
The Federal Police sent three photographs of a man wanted for tax evasion to their Irish counterparts, saying that they had reason to believe that he had escaped to Ireland. The photos were front face and two side shots.
Three weeks later the Irish Police sent back a message: "We got the fellow in the middle, but we are still looking for the other two."
Best Use of Tax Dollars Ever!
When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ball-point pens would not work in zero gravity.
To combat this problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion developing a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to over 300° C.
The Russians use a pencil.
2nd Best Use of Tax Dollars Ever!!
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