Ian
D GabbardWindows XP Recall
August 10th 2006 03:48
Windows XP Recall
It has come to our attention that a few copies of the Alabama edition of Windows XP may have accidentally been shipped outside Alabama.
If you have one of the Alabama editions you may need some help understanding the commands.
The Alabama edition may be recognized by looking at the opening screen.
It reads WINDERS XP with a background picture of the General Lee superimposed on a Confederate flag.
It is shipped with a Daisy Duke screen saver.
Also note the Recycle Bin is labelled Outhouse,
My Computer is called This Infernal Contraption, My Network Places is called Good Ol' Boys, Control Panel is known as the Dern Dashboard,
Windows for Rednecks
Other features:
Instead of a error message you get a winder covered with a garbage bag and duct tape.
OK = ats aww-right
cancel = hail no
reset = awa shoot
yes = shore
no = Naaaa
find = hunt-fer it
go to = over yonder
back = back yonder
help = hep me out here
stop = ternit off
start = crank it up
settings = sittins
programs = stuff at does stuff
documents = stuff I done done
Also note that Winders XP does not recognize capital letters or punctuation marks. Some programs that are exclusive to winders XP
tiperiter...........A word processor
colering book.......a graphics program
addin mershene......calculator
outhouse paper .....notepad
jupe-box...........CD Player
inner-net...........Microsoft Explorer
pichers.............A graphics viewer
IRS.................M/S accounting software
IRS2................M/S accounting software with hidden files
coon dog............American kennel club records
fishin..............Bass Anglers Sportsman Society records.
NRA.................National Rifle Association
shot gun...........Remington Arms price list
riffel..............Winchester price list
pisstel.............Smith & Wesson price list
truck...............Ford & Chevrolet dealers in Alabama, by zip code
house...............Nearest Mobile home repair service, by zip code
car.................same as truck, just need two lists in Alabama
cuzzins.............family history, usually a 30 meg file
tax records.........usually an empty file
shells..............ammunition inventory, another 30 meg file
bud................list of Budweiser dealers, by zip code
rasin...............NASCAR racing schedule, includes list of TV stations that carry the race
parts..............nearest Junk yard, by zip code
doc................veterinarians, by zip code
We regret any inconvenience it may have caused if you received a copy of the Alabama edition. You may return it to Microsoft for a replacement version.
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