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Jokes - June 2008

Women - As Explained By Engineers

June 23rd 2008 12:45
To find a woman you need time and money. Therefore Woman = Time x Money. Time is money so:. Time = Money. Therefore Woman = Money x Money. Woman = (Money)^2. Money is the root of all problems. Money = /Problems. Therefore: Woman = problems


Hazardous materials data sheet. Element : Woman. Symbol : Wo. Atomic Weight : Accepted as 55kg, but known to vary between 45kg to 225kg. Discoverer : Adam. Occurrence : Copious quantities in all Urban areas, with slightly lower concentrations in Suburban and Rural areas. Subject to seasonal fluctuations. Physical Properties : Surface usually covered with painted film. Boils at nothing, freezes without reason. Melts if given special treatment. Bitter if used incorrectly. Can cause headaches. Handle with care! Found in various states; ranging from virgin metal to common ore. Yields to pressure applied to correct points. Chemical Properties : Has great affinity for Gold, Silver, Platinum and many precious stones. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances. May explode spontaneously if left alone on dates. Insoluble in liquids, but there is increased activity when saturated in alcohol to a certain point. Repels cheap material. Neutral to common sense. Most powerful money reducing agent known to Man. Uses : Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars. Can greatly improve relaxation levels. Can warm and comfort under some circumstances. Can cool things down when it's too hot. Useful for general cleaning, scrubbing, washing, rubbing, etc. Tests : Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in natural state. Turns green when placed beside a better specimen. Caution : Highly dangerous except in experienced hands. Use extreme care when handling. Illegal to possess more than one.


Chances of a man winning an argument. Years. Dating. Engagement. Marriage Period


Controls for men and women. One knob for men, many for women.


Mission: Go to Gap, buy a pair of pants. Man straight to Gap. Woman - Macy's, Sears, JC Penny

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Posted By: Ian - Category: Men and Women
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1 Comments. [ Add A Comment ]

Comment by MelissaA

June 24th 2008 09:48


Fun Facts
I'd seen the 1st, 2nd, and 4th one's before, (still great), but I hadn't seen 3 and 5 which I love - especially the total cost of the Gap one.

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